The Mean Reds

I've got a bad case of the mean reds. If you don't know what they are, gentle reader, I'll allow Holly Golightly to explain:
Holly: Listen...you know those days when you get the mean reds?
Fred/Paul: The mean reds? You mean like the blues?"
Holly: No... the blues are because you're getting fat or because it's been raining too long. You're just sad, that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling?

Well I do. The mean reds creep up on me, like a case of poison ivy. At first I'm only itching at a small thing, like a toe, or the fact that my cell phone will not charge and cingular won't give me a new one. And then slowly, over a few days, it begins to reach into every part of my life. A trip to the bank becomes the basis for a near nervous breakdown. A joke made a friend or relative becomes a slight of Capulet and Montague proportions. When the reds meet their full potential, it's like I'm standing on the edge of a void, with no recourse or remedy. The world is arrayed against me.

There are only two things for it. One is to go back to bed for the rest of the day. Tempting, but sadly that often makes it worse, in that not only am I low, but also I haven't gotten anything done. The other solution is to take a bath. It helps. It is not a cure all, but the only thing that really cures the mean reds is a change of outlook. And that takes action. So consider this it. Here are my favorite bath bubbles, oils, etc.

1) Neals Yard Remedies Aromatic Bath: I am sure I have mentioned this one before, because it is one of my favorite products of all time. It smells like heaven. Or maybe just Provence on a June day, because it is filled with very high quality lavender oil and extract. But isn't that a kind of heaven? Besides, the Mean Reds don't speak french!

2) Kiehl's- When I run out of my Neal's, I blend a few squirts of Kiehl's Kiehl's Mineral Muscle Soak Foaming-Relaxing Bathwith a few squirts of Coriander Bath and Shower Liquid Body Cleanser. It makes my skin soft and I smell so good I forget to be red!


3) Lush's Cerwiden Bath Melt- A caveat before I continue: going into an actual Lush store would probably make my mean reds meaner. They are overwhelmingly fragrant and sticky places. So do yourself a favor and order this one online. You'll be happy you did, because the melt is full of sandelwood, cocoa butter and rose, and it smells the most exotic vacation. This must be what Bali or Tahiti smells like. I am lulled into believing that my life is full of wonderful things, like future vacations to unknown lands, and at the last, I have hope; the best cure for the reds!